I want to throw a tantrum, but I'm too sad

[beeinmybonnet]

I was at the allergist at the allergy department today. It's at a children's hospital, and I think I was the oldest one there. Anyways.

The doctor more or less told me that getting a dog was an atrocious idea (and he couldn't even explain why I can't breathe properly; all he said was that it didn't sound like asthma).

I know that I shouldn't have deluded myself into thinking that there was at least a chance of getting a dog, but I did, and now I feel awful. I've wanted a dog for as long as I remember, and my family love dogs, especially mum. But because of my allergy, there is no sodding chance of getting one.

I wouldn't be quite as crushed if A) people had said that there was a 95% percent risk that I'm too allergic instead of just saying 'maybe' over and over again, and B) I wasn't already allergic to:

Milk protein and lactose

Soy protein (bye bye, yakiniku!)

Nuts and almonds

ALL raw vegetables and fruits, including potatoes

Citrus fruits and leguminous plants no matter if they are cooked or not

More plants and flowers than I can count

Silver birch and grass pollen, both serious allergies (which makes me unable to be near hay)

As good as every other kinds of trees and grass

Nickel and all other metals

All furred animals, except horses (but since I'm allergic to hay, I can't be in a stable anyways)

Cigarette smoke, perfumes, incense and other strong smells

Make up (lipstick and lip gloss work, mascara and eyeshadow do not)

Did I mention my severe asthma?
So, on top of all of these allergies that make my life quite difficult in certain situations, I can't have a dog either. Am I allowed to say that this is unfair?

... Right now I just want to huddle myself up in an armchair and re-watch episode four of Brideshead Revisited, "Sebastian against the world." It would fit my mood right now, I should think; alcoholism, crumbling friendships/relationships, subtext and just plain, first class angst.

Because I'm feeling so terrible, I might be a bit late with answering comments and e-mails. Sorry for that.

Comments

[roterhimmel.livejournal.com]

Oh darling, I'm so sorry. It does sound like you have a very hard time. *hugs tightly*

You're allergic to all of the listed above?!... this is... quite, erm, not stunning, but crazy? Allergic to so many things? What do you eat? I mean,... nuts, fruits, potatoes, milk and lactose, and... sheesh. This is really hard... I hope you're relaxing some, take a hot bath and read a bit, draw or listen to music... try to distract yourself. I cross my fingers for you to feel better! Whenever you want to talk, you have my email addy. <3

[beeinmybonnet.livejournal.com]

So, five days later I finally manage to reply. Gods, I'm so sorry!

Thank you. ♥ I feel better now, now when the initial grief has passed.

It is crazy. Also, now I remember that I forgot to add sweetening agents to the list. Oh well.

What do you eat?
*laughs* You know, that is the question I get asked most often. That and why aren't thin as a stick. There is actually a surprising amount of food you can eat even if you're allergic, and many things you can use substitutes for.

So, again, thank you. ♥ This meant a lot to me, really.

[roterhimmel.livejournal.com]

nnnh. If you say so. I just can't imagine -... what to eat. I guess, this comes with when you get used to it. Or rather, when you've got no other choice. But to miss all the lovely dishes out there :O

[beeinmybonnet.livejournal.com]

Well, it does help that I still eat like a three-year-old. *g* There are... what, thirty-forty dishes I really enjoy? No, not even that many. And I only ate those even before I got diagnosed withh my allergies, so I'm not really missing out on anything (in my opinion). THOUGH I MISS THE ICE-CREAM AND CHEESE AND CREAM, YES I DO.

[roterhimmel.livejournal.com]

I swear, I'd miss ice-cream the most. Sheesh. You poor girl. But I guess if you're used to it... still. *a hug for the lack of ice-cream in your life!*